What does "Allowing" mean to you?

My initial introduction to The Great Allowing began with an inquiry into surrender about 10 years ago. Given my Default Mode Network,*** it’s understandable why surrender would be significant in my healing process (see “My Story” for more context). During deep expanded states of consciousness work, the theme of surrender would emerge, and I would carry important information, reflections and practices into the integration process. After some time, I became aware of resistance that always came up for me around surrender - it was a subtle physical response.  Letting my curiosity guide me, I began to identify my associations with surrender, which included "to give up," "to fail," and "to lose." This awareness coincided with a shift in the inquiry towards allowing. I began to explore what allowing meant for me and noticed it was free of resistance. This is one of many instances which proved to me that we all have access to a deeper source of intelligence which doesn't come from the mind or the brain. I call this source of intelligence the "psyche".

Initially, the concept of allowing was disorienting, because I had no reference for it.  However, as I began to build a relationship with allowing, I became aware of a prevailing sense of liberation and openness. I was amazed by the intelligence that seemed to guide this whole process. Over time, I discovered that allowing offered a choice that I could make in various situations. The fact that I could choose not to control, manage, or make something happen was an entirely new concept. This is where the liberation came in — What if I were to trust that I didn’t always have to do something?!  Thus began my relationship with The Great Allowing. 

Over the next couple of weeks, reflect on what 'allowing' means to you.  

You can approach this however you’d like. Below are some prompts that may be helpful, and I've shared some examples of what has come up for me:

What feelings arise when you allow?

Everyone's response to allowing is unique. For example, my initial feelings were disorientation and curiosity, which over time led to relief.

What questions come up? 

Questions that arose for me included, "Will I accomplish anything if I allow?" and "How do I know when to allow and when to act?"

What is the opposite of allowing? Is allowing something that comes to you more easily than its opposite? 

For me, the opposite of allowing is my tendency to lead, direct, control, and manage - this has been my Default Mode Network***.

What discoveries did you make?

One of the discoveries I made was that allowing is a choice I can make in any situation. Another is that there are times when it's best to take charge and be decisive.

Perhaps track the choice points that present themselves as you move through your day when you can either choose to be directive or choose to allow.

You are invited to share your discoveries in the comments section to engage others in the conversation.

***The Default Mode Network (DMN) refers to deep neurobiological ruts that are usually established very early on in our lives to adapt to the environment we live in.  DMN’s inform how we move through the world; our thoughts, beliefs, relational patterns and behaviors.